Truth, Trust, and Healthy Relationships
In Week 9 of our STONE series, Pastor CJ Ward explores the Ninth Commandment:
"You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor."
At first glance, this command can seem straightforward. Most of us immediately think about lying in a courtroom or giving false testimony. But as we dig deeper, we discover that this command reaches into every relationship we have.
The Ninth Commandment is ultimately about trust.
And trust is built on truth.
Main Scripture: Exodus 20:16
What This Message Is About
Throughout the STONE series, we’ve seen that the Ten Commandments are more than rules. They are covenant commitments that shape how we relate to God and to one another.
The Ninth Commandment reminds us that healthy relationships cannot exist without honesty.
Pastor CJ points out that when we hear “bear false witness,” many of us think about legal settings—and that’s certainly part of the command. God was establishing a trustworthy legal process for His people because justice cannot exist without truth. But the implications don’t stop in the courtroom.
- Truth impacts marriages.
- Truth impacts friendships.
- Truth impacts families.
- Truth impacts churches.
- Truth impacts communities.
A healthy community is built on healthy relationships, healthy relationships are built on trust, and trust is built on truth.
Truth Is the Foundation of Trust
One of the central themes of the message is simple:
- Trust is the foundation of healthy relationships.
- Truth is the foundation of trust.
Pastor CJ shares from his experience in premarital counseling, where he regularly tells engaged couples that healthy marriages cannot survive with secrets. Couples who want lasting relationships must commit themselves to complete honesty and transparency.
Why?
Because secrets destroy trust.
Secrets grow.
Secrets multiply.
And the longer secrets remain hidden, the more damage they do.
Many broken relationships don’t collapse overnight. Instead, trust is slowly eroded over time through secrecy, half-truths, hidden behaviors, and withheld information.
The Ninth Commandment calls us to reject deception and embrace truth.
More Than Just Lying
Pastor CJ also expands our understanding of what it means to bear false witness.
False witness certainly includes knowingly telling lies. But it also includes speaking with certainty about things we do not actually know to be true.
This is especially relevant in our modern culture.
Social media has made it easy to spread rumors, assumptions, opinions, and accusations without ever verifying whether something is true.
Followers of Jesus are called to something different.
We are not called to repeat everything we hear.
We are not called to share every rumor.
We are not called to assume motives.
We are called to be people of truth.
The Ninth Commandment challenges us to ask:
- Is this true?
- Do I know it is true?
- Am I speaking from facts or assumptions?
- Will my words build trust or destroy it?
Living in the Light
One of the strongest applications from this message is the call to live without secrets.
Many people carry hidden struggles, hidden sins, hidden fears, or hidden shame. While secrecy may feel safe in the moment, secrecy rarely leads to health.
Truth brings freedom.
Truth creates trust.
Truth invites healing.
The Gospel invites believers to live in the light rather than hiding in darkness.
When we confess, repent, and bring hidden things into the open, God begins to transform us. The enemy thrives in secrecy.
Jesus calls us into truth.
Gospel and Grace
The reality is that every one of us has failed this command.
We’ve all exaggerated.
We’ve all hidden things.
We’ve all withheld truth.
We’ve all spoken carelessly.
We’ve all damaged trust.
The good news of the Gospel is that Jesus is “the truth.”
He perfectly embodied truth.
He never deceived.
He never manipulated.
He never misrepresented.
And through His death and resurrection, we can be forgiven and transformed.
Jesus doesn’t simply forgive our dishonesty; He changes us into people who love truth and walk in integrity.
The Gospel empowers us to become trustworthy people.
Practical Application
This week, ask yourself:
- Is there an area of my life where I’m hiding something?
- Is there a relationship where trust has been damaged?
- Have I spoken about someone in a way that was not fully true?
- What would it look like for me to live with greater honesty and transparency?
Truth may be difficult in the moment, but it is always healthier than deception.
Take you Next Step
This week, choose one area where you can intentionally walk in truth.
Maybe it’s confessing something you’ve hidden.
Maybe it’s repairing trust in a relationship.
Maybe it’s choosing honesty in a difficult conversation.
Or maybe your next step is surrendering your life to Jesus—the One who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life.
Truth leads to trust, and trust leads to healthy relationships.
Did you like the message, Ninth Commandment? If so, check out more of our Sunday teachings here.